Love & Kindness

Today I share with you the real life struggle of having a love hate relationship with yourself, but by shifting it to just be a loving relationship you can change your energy and the world you live in.

This morning I was faced with a situation that triggered an inner dialogue of stories from my past. Stories that have truth at the core but I put all my thoughts and emotions on top of it. This is something all of us humans do! Something happens - We attach a thought to it - Then add on emotions and feelings - Mix it up and create a story. This is how a belief around a certain "situation" is created, so when ever it happens again you will tell yourself that crazy little story you made up.

This was me this morning.

I knew the moment I was triggered and the stories from my past and the beliefs started coming thick and fast. I meditated to shift it. No luck. So I journaled, and the words came out strong. Everything I was telling myself was to do with the past, not my current moment. The past has happened, but I will not let it define my future. So I decided to do a re-framing activity:
1) What is a fact about the current situation that has happened?
2) What is a factual thought?
3) What is a positive emotion that supports that thought?
4) What is a belief about this situation that serves me in a positive way?

Then it shifted. My new story served me in a positive way, and it was factual. I felt better but also vulnerable. The old story and belief I was telling myself was to protect me, ego has a funny way of doing that. The new story and belief is truth and honest. This is vulnerability - to have courage and speak your truth. 

What I went through this morning brings me back to showing up with love and kindness for yourself. Imagine going through the hard bits in life and beating yourself up in the middle of it. Not a nice feeling. But what if you were to go through the hard bits, the triggers, the challenging bits and showed up with love and kindness for yourself? How much nicer would it be to go through all of that.

So take a moment today and show yourself love. Pure love.

Give yourself a big hug. Look in the mirror and say I love you. Sit with yourself and only you. Create space for you to be you. Speak kind words to yourself as your body is listening. Date yourself.

Cultivate a healthy relationship with you.

There is only one you. You are so important and precious. You bring to this world something no one else can bring. You have one amazing body, love and cherish it.

Have your own back. Stand up for you. Check in with you and know that your choices support your values. Put yourself first.

The most important relationship you will ever have is with yourself. Spend time falling in love with you. Cherish the moments you have with yourself. Embrace all of the imperfections, as you are perfect just the way you are.

Kirsty Kohlhagen